Naturally I have come up with a list myselfs.
- Don't be shy about jabbing rude people that have almost knocked you over with your crutches, and then watch the shame wash over them when they realise what they were hit with.
- Get a backpack with a chest strap - you'll look super sexy (for a nerd) and your bag wont fall off your shoulders
- Wear things with pockets - handy for storing things you cant carry in your hands when you are crutching around... which is everything. i found a bum bag, it is awesome.
- Getting food from where you have made it to where you want to eat it - this can be tricky if there are no handy people around, i suggest using flasks and lunchboxes.
- If you live in a two story house, when going from one floor to the other - pack as if you are going abroad.
- Tesco.ie - they deliver.. let me clarify - they deliver booze.
- Be prepared for strangers to offer random advise - accept it with a smile unless its a bad story - like your leg will fall off or something. Those people are not your friends.
- Going up the stairs - good foot first then crutches, or if you're at home, bum first and everything else after
- Going down the stairs - crutches first then good foot.
- Up or down the stairs - if possible get someone to carry your other crutch and use a sturdy banister to help you.
- When you're sitting at home on your ass you're going to start feeling useless after a few days - remember it could have been worse - could have been your head. you need your head.
- Use socks and a surgical tape like Medisilk to pad the handles of your crutches - your hands will get sore anyways - but this will at least dull the pain - yaay!!
- Having a wash - if you have one of those shower over the bath jobbys then you are in luck! strap on that industrial thickness rubbish bag (cellotape and rubberbands are my weapon of choice) and sit down in it for the least trouble preventing water getting at your cast.
- Wash the toes of the foot that has the cast on, they get missed out on with the plastic bag over the leg job... and they will start to smell like a mature Stilton.
- Toe cooling devices - fibre glass casts can get inescapably hot, i recommend getting into a car and put the aircon on cool and then put your toasty toes up on the dashboard ..oohhh!
- If someone calls over to see how you are, prepare a list of things you want them to carry from one place to another.. they can do it alot easier than you!
- When people ask you what you have been doing? always say: dance classes, bungee jumping, skydiving, training for the marathon, or surfing lessons.. it cracks people up... but not the second time so made a list of people you have used this crack with to avoid embarrassment.
- Do something with your time -start a blog, learn HTML, relearn crochet, make a menagerie of small felt animals (below), organise your photos, read, watch IMDB top 250 movies, buy random things from ebay, laugh at the problem pages on boards.ie, watch an entire dramatic tv series (the wire, sopranos, six feet under, the west wing) interspliced with a really awful comedy series (how i met your mother, the big band theory).. however it is always completely unacceptable to watch Two and a Half Men and the Jeremy Kyle show.
- Enjoy your new He-man arm muscles! Lift things over your head in a dramatic fashion! YAAAAARGAH!
Mulq
Disclaimer: i don't accept any responsibility for bad thing that happen as a result of following this advise. I accept all responsibility for good things.
